[ dramadramaduck Blog ] (locked, but SO easy to hack, since he's

[savior_n_black]

Ugh...What a fucked up week.
Those fucking guns that old jackass had were the only reason he even landed a hit, but my ribs are still telling me about it.

Then, Maggie, and that Mikaela girl are alien robots? About had a heart attack just hearing some random video post of screaming, and end up in America, on another world, with a bunch of american military guys all around so I could hardly move without accidentally bumping into one, and then the guy would freak out. Took me until the next day just to get back to Karakura!


...



Now, they all want me to use my Bankai. Which, of course they would! And I'm not fucking scared, or some stupid shit...just...don't want to be dependent on it. Godamnitt who am I kidding. I'm having a hard enough time keeping the hollow from taking over my soul without using Bankai!

...Just have to think it through. That's all. Just watch, and keep up what I'm doing...Can't believe I almost broke that kid's neck...what the fuck is happening to me?

...Oh GOD, and that little arrancar knows! He knows, and I'm waiting for something to pop up any fucking second about it. You're an idiot, Kurosaki, and you need to pull yourself together! Because that Ggio kid is going to run off, and tell Grimmjow, and then I'll never hear the goddamned end of it. Or they'll just be attacking Karakura again, and I won't be ready...again...


((OOC: Strikes = things Ichigo thought he deleted this time. This is also what Ichigo is referring to when he says that Ggio "knows" too ♥. ))

Comments

[locked]

[ridethetiger]

I know what the fuck 'choice' is, and we - well most of us made the decision. You have no fucking clue what we'd have to be going through if we didn't become arrancar by Aizen's hands. I'm not apologizing for wanting to be more than a beast.

And just so you know? I can't speak for everyone else, but I sure as hell didn't have a choice. Better this than insane or dead. Not much better, but hey. I'll cling to whatever life I can get, however pathetic it is.

[locked] ( giaugfiug INTERNET WAS DOWN ALL DAY ToT!!! )

[savior_n_black]

....


What do you mean you didn't have a choice?

[locked] ( skdbkdbsf IT'S OKAY BB! ;O; I'm here, just playing Gundam with the bro!)

[ridethetiger]

I mean exactly what I said, I didn't have a choice.

But enough about me. Wasn't there something you're supposed to be telling me?

[locked] ( ;.;! Okay! Fooding then I'll hop on <3 )

[savior_n_black]

....Fine. You wanna know so bad, how about this;

You tell me how you became an Arrancar, and I'll tell you how I became a Vizard.

[locked] ( great, I'll be here! <3 )

[ridethetiger]

Fair enough.

Barragan-sama found me in the desert, and rather than finish me off he demanded I serve him. The rest of my life in servitude in exchange for, well, being allowed to live. Not too bad, really.

You? The hell is a Vizard?

[locked]

[savior_n_black]

Who's Barragan?

[locked]

[ridethetiger]

Nuh-uh, you gotta answer a question first. You're not playing fair, shinigami.

[locked]

[savior_n_black]

...Fine. One answer, then you answer me.

The Vizards all talk like they have hollows inside them too, and I've seen at least one put on, and take off her mask at will, and without loosing her mind.

Your turn; who's Barragan?

[locked]

[ridethetiger]

He's the Segunda Espada, higher than Grimmjow, and the one I directly serve under.

So these Vizards are other shinigami with Hollows. And that's what you are now?

[locked]

[savior_n_black]

...

I don't know about the others, but I started out as shinigami.

...And no. I'm human...and shinigami...and hollow..AUGH! I don't know okay?! I don't know what I am, or anything because according to everyone else, it's not supposed to be possible for this to happen!

[locked]

[ridethetiger]

Guess that just makes you special. You've got all this power and - what exactly are you doing with it?

[locked]

[savior_n_black]

Keeping the people I care about, and my town safe.

...Safe from you, and you're precious Grimmjow who wants to destroy everyone, and everything I care about!

[locked]

[ridethetiger]

If you know what's good for you you'll take care not to mock who Grimmjow is to me.

Especially when you two - forget it.

[locked]

[savior_n_black]

I'm not mocking 'what he is to you', and I'm actually not mocking anything! This is me being fucking tired of listening to this 'poor me' shit! You're smart, and strong, and there's no reason why you can't think for yourself!

I get wanting to repay a debt, but this is wrong! You don't even act like you agree with Aizen! And how do you serve this 'Segunda' person, but still spend all this time with Grimmjow?!

So you might as well say it, and don't tell me to forget it when you let something dangle like that!

[locked]

[ridethetiger]

If you think I'm looking for pity forget. This is the truth about arrancar - well, some I guess. Not all of us are exactly happy being where we are, but it's preferable to death or insanity or worse.

I don't act like I agree with Aizen because I don't fucking know what he wants, besides perfection. Which I don't think he found in any of us anyway.

And I don't spend that much time with Grimmjow. I can't. Anything else or do you wanna spill more righteous bullshit?

[locked]

[savior_n_black]

If you're not looking for pity, then fine; you've still got a choice in who you follow, and why.

...And why can't you spend time with Grimmjow? I thought you two were...er...dating, or something?

[locked]

[ridethetiger]

I'll leave that alone for now.

Not sure why you wanna know but... it's complicated. He's not the Espada I serve, and I'm not even supposed to know him. Just the way 'His Majesty' works. I'm not supposed to know or be concerned with anything but serving him.

[locked]

[savior_n_black]

What?!
That's so stupid! If you love someone, you should spend time with them!! That...that....AUGH! That's just dumb, and this Segunda fucker doesn't own you! NO ONE 'owns' you!

[locked] strikes hackable

[ridethetiger]

We don't love. Not - not like you think. It's not that easy. But the 'sad' truth is we're all caged here, we may as well be pets. Owned. Whatever. So long as Barragan-sama finds worth in me, and I be less obvious don't disobey, he'll keep me alive. I should be lucky he's that merciful.

Besides, it's not me I'm worried about him killing.

[locked]

[savior_n_black]

That's not mercy, it's tyranny! You're not animals!! No one has a right to cage you no matter what it is they've done for you, or to you, and no one else can measure your worth except you!!

This...This is so wrong, and I don't understand why the fuck Aizen does anything that he has, and I don't really get you arrancar either.
If you know what choice is, then why do you put yourself through all that? Why can't you break free, and be with the people you love?

What is it that's really stopping you?

[locked] sorry for the tl;dr XD;

[ridethetiger]

...

That's just... not how it works. You don't know how powerful Barragan is - not that any arrancar here is as powerful as Aizen-sama, but Barragan's power... It's terrible, the things he can do.

The strong survive, simple as that. I wasn't one of them, but Barragan spared me anyway. I could thank him, in a sick way, even though I didn't know how little life meant to me until Grimmjow happened. I've endured this before and I'll continue to do so, because worse than just killing me he could put Grimmjow through the worst kind of death if he knew that's where my loyalty lies. He could take it out on Charlotte or Avirama or - hell, damn near anyone else here.

We've all gone through one form of hell or another, and it doesn't stop as easily as wanting it. I haven't forgotten who what I am. I'm an arrancar, and this is how we 'live'. Even if everyone from the community wants differently... it's not something we can change that simply.

Besides... he said he'll make that change happen, and I'll believe him.

Even if we could leave, where the hell could we go? We'd starve anywhere but Hueco Mundo, we would have the take other's souls, and the whole damn war would be taken somewhere else.

Anyway... aren't we supposed to be enemies? Why would you care what happens to us?

[locked] (No worries bb~! )

[savior_n_black]

That's wrong damnitt! Using your loved ones against you like that!
And maybe everyone in DDD wants differently because that, what you've got, isn't really living; it's existing, and clinging to the little bits of life you do have to keep from losing your soul to despair!


....And I care because if this--any of this--is true, then it means Aizen is just using you guys too.

Well, fuck that! You can see me as your enemy all you want, but I don't see you as mine. I'll fight Aizen. I'll win. And I'll set you...all of you free.

Believe me, or don't, it doesn't matter. Fight me, or don't, I don't care.

I'll...I'll free all of you! And I won't stop until I do!

icon spam~ go!

[ridethetiger]

[ridethetiger]

[locked] (and done!)

[ridethetiger]

What... are you saying? We're not looking to be saved - and I don't need someone else protecting me I don't want to be so weak need help. That's not what I was saying at all. Besides, Aizen-sama is ignoring you for now, I think, it would probably be better to keep attention off of yourself?

You really shouldn't put yourself through that for us. Not everyone is like me, and most would sooner fight or kill you than listen. We're - I'm - not asking for a hero, that's not for us. Anything we want, we'll have to fight for. Same as always.